读后续写素材库之环境描写系列(2)Rain
2.1 Kissed by the rain and glistening, the wet ground is cold under foot. Stepping off the path and into the shaggy grass I feel the squelch of the mudbeneath. The water rises up and runs between my toes. The birds busy themselves around me, not caring that I'm there, all they want is the worms that have come up for air.
译文:潮湿的地面走起来很冷,被雨水亲吻后闪闪发光。走下小路,走进草丛,我感到脚下泥泞的吱吱声。水涨起来,在我的脚趾间流动。鸟儿们在我周围忙碌着,不关心我在哪儿,他们只想要抓那些爬上来呼吸新鲜空气的虫子。
生词难词
shaggy长而乱的; 乱蓬蓬的; 头发蓬乱的
squelch发吧唧声,发扑哧声
worms蠕虫; 寄生虫; 肠虫; 幼虫; 蠕动,曲折行进; 给驱肠虫; worm的第三人称
技法讲解:拟人的运用
E.g.Kissedby the rain and glistening,the wet ground is…
在这里,我们形容雨落在地上,不直接说the rain fall on the ground(雨落在地上),而是说the ground is kissed by the rain(雨亲吻着路面),就是一个拟人的手法,kiss是一个简单的词,但是用了拟人的手法后,使得整个句子充满文学性,这种写法在续写中是很推崇的,能让你的句子优美、生动、形象、传神。
再比如:
E.g. The raindrummed onthe window,bidding farewell tothe last beam of sunlight.
雨落在窗户上,多么平常的场景,但是在这个句子中我们用了drummed on,就是说雨敲打在窗户上好像敲起了小鼓,瞬间变得生动形象。紧接着,写太阳落山、黄昏来临,我们也不直接写,而是转了个弯,说The rain bid farewell to the last beam of sunlight.(雨向最后一缕阳光告别),是不是很优美。这套材料中,类似的拟人用法还有很多,就不再一一列举,请同学们自己留意,细细体会这种用法的妙处。
•2-2. Softly splashing water droplets hit the car windows as we drive onwards. The skies are overhung with a blanket of grey, so much so that I can barely tell the difference between the sky and clouds.
译文 :当我们向前行驶时,溅起的水珠轻轻地落在车窗上。天空覆盖着一层灰色,我几乎看不出天空和云的区别。
亮点词汇
softly轻轻地; 轻柔地; 温和地; 柔和地
droplets小滴; droplet的复数
onwardsadv.从起一直; 向前; 前往
overhung悬垂; 悬挂; 突出于某物之上; overhang的过去分词和过去式
so much so that到这种程度; 甚至于
barely仅仅; 刚刚; 勉强可能; 几乎不; 几乎没有; 刚好
•2-3. Darkened gray smudges of wool threateningly surrounded the sky, like a predator would encircle its prey. A startling low rumble rang loud in the cool fall air, the sky roaring with satisfaction. Trickles of liquid hit the ground with as much force as a small child. Gradually, drizzles turn into canon fires, barricading everything in its way.
译文:乌云布满天空,就像捕食者包围猎物一样。凉爽的秋风中传来一阵震耳欲聋的低沉隆隆声,天空似乎满意地咆哮着。涓涓细流像小孩子一样猛烈地撞击地面。逐渐地,毛毛细雨变得像加农炮一样猛烈,阻挡住了一切。
亮点词汇
hit the ground触地
drizzles下毛毛雨; 洒落; 毛毛细雨; drizzle的第三人称单数和复数
barricading阻碍,阻挡; barricade的现在分词
生词难词
smudges污迹,污痕; 把…擦模糊; 变模糊; 弄脏; 留下污迹; smudge的第三人称单数和复数
技法讲解:比喻的运用
比喻主要可分simile(明喻)和metaphor(暗喻)两种
·句中的darkened gray smudges of wool暗喻密布的乌云,属于metaphor
·like a predator would encircle its prey则是将乌云攒聚在天空的景象比作捕食者围猎的场景,属于simile。
·canon fires是加农炮的意思,比喻大雨磅礴的场面,用得极为生动
•2-4.A sense of cleanliness caresses the atmosphere, washing away all impurities. A dense earthly sweet smell rises from the ground, envelopingeverything within its soft embrace.
译文:清新的感觉抚慰着空气,洗去了所有的杂质。一股浓郁的泥土般的香味从地上升起,把一切都包裹在它柔软的怀抱里。
亮点词汇
caresses抚摩; 爱抚; 亲吻; caress的第三人称单数和复数
a sense of感; ……的感觉
washing away冲刷
earthly人间的; 尘世的; 世俗的; 可能的
enveloping包住; 裹住; 盖住; envelop的现在分词
embrace抱; 拥抱; 欣然接受,乐意采纳; 信奉; 包括; 包含; 拥抱,怀抱
2-5 The heavy rains have carved a miniature canyon in the path. Doubtless the soil was made soft by the gentle rainfall the previous week and so was no match for the sudden deluge. Hayley skips from side to side, thrilled with the new addition to the woodland walk.
译文:暴雨在道路上冲击出了一个微型峡谷。毫无疑问,前一周的温和降雨使土壤变软了,这与突然降临的瓢泼大雨截然不同。海莉从一边跳到另一边,为森林散步的新体验感到兴奋。
亮点词汇
carvev.雕刻
doubtless大概; 几乎肯定地
no match for不能与…相比;敌不过…
deluge暴雨; 大雨; 洪水; 蜂拥而至的事物; 使涌来; 使充满; 泛滥; 淹没
skips from side to side从一边跳到另一边,来来回回地蹦蹦跳跳(想象一下,下雨的时候路上有水坑,所以就有了skips from side to side)
thrilled非常兴奋; 极为激动
生词难词
miniature a.很小的;微型的;小型的 n.微型画;小画像;缩微模型;微型复制品
canyon n.(周围有悬崖峭壁的)峡谷
• 2-6 Rain and tears mingle on my face, salty tracks blending into the fresh sky-fallen trickles. Only the pinkness of my eyes gives any clue to my sadness.
译文 :雨水和泪水在我脸上交织到一起,只有我的略略泛红的眼睛能暗示出我内心的悲伤。
亮点词汇
mingle v.与…结合; 使混合; 使联结; 相交往,混杂其中
blending使混合; 掺和; 混合; 融合; 调和,协调; blend的现在分词
give clue to暗示,提供线索
生词难词
•trickle v.(使)滴,淌,小股流淌;(使)慢慢走,缓慢移动n.细流;涓流;稀稀疏疏缓慢来往的东西